Saturday, March 24, 2012

Team Bill

I wanted to thank you all for your love and support of Bill. It has been amazing how many people in my life have been taking time out of their day to pray for Bill. The good news is the prayers are working. Bill is still unconscious, but moving more and more each day. The brain swelling is down and his lungs are healing. Each day we receive more positive news from Dayton, Ohio. Bill will have a long road of recovery ahead of him so keep up the prayers please as he keeps up the fight.

Although the news overall has been positive, the truth is right now we are just waiting for Bill to come out of this coma. It could be up to three weeks total. That is a lot of time to sit and wait, and ultimately become negative. So far, I personally have only had a few moments in the week and a half since the accident that I have thought a negative thought. Your prayers and support are part of what keeps me sending Bill positive vibes. I also just keep thinking about seeing Bill in the hospital. I continually go over what I want to tell him about, what I'm going to say, I've even tried to put together an outfit in my head. All of those thoughts might seem pretensions, but really it's about the fact that I will see and speak to Bill again. The dogs will have their dog dad alive and well, even if he is across the country.

I am really proud of those two dogs by the way. Missy had a rough few days. She threw up everyday and became extra needy. ((Since Missy is already needy in general, extra needy is almost unbearable. It's like moving around with an extra 26 pounds on top of you at all times)) Strangely enough, as soon as Bill's brain swelling went down, the puking stopped. Even more strange, I didn't know his brain swelling went down until after the fact. Now try and tell me those two aren't forever linked emotionally and spiritually. We might have opposable thumbs, but dogs are one with the universe in a way we can never imagine. At least that's my take on it anyway.

So again, thank you for joining Team Bill. Keep up the fight.

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Please Pray for Bill

On Wednesday morning in Dayton, Ohio the dogs' dad, Bill, was in a horrible car accident. His friend, who was driving, was killed instantly. Bill is in critical condition in the ICU. He's unconscious, and will continue to be for possibly another 3 weeks. To say our world has been rocked is an understatement.

I love Bill with all my heart. In the days leading up to the accident, that's all I could think about. How much I just love him and how I just had to call him to tell him that, again, once he arrived in North Carolina. To tell him how nothing else really mattered and that no matter what, we had to find away to stay in each others lives. Then Wednesday I answered the phone at work and seconds later ended up on the floor trying to catch my breath.

Now, every free thought I have is with Bill and his family. There is no use traveling to Dayton at this point because only family is allowed in the ICU ((if I thought I could see him I'd be on the next plane, the first one leaves at 6am from Spokane every day)) Instead I'm making it my mission that every single person in my life pray for Bill. So far I have him on the prayer list at my church, my church family in the Tri-Cities, and almost every member's of my family.

The good news is Bill is a fighter. There are actual signs he is fighting. Bill also has an amazing will to live, love, and laugh. He has an amazing heart and a passion that burns inside of him. Now he needs our prayers. Please pray for Bill. I know if my dogs were people they would be praying too. If there was one person who deserved this less I can't name them.

We love you Bill. Keep fighting. We'll keep praying.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Trying to Move On

It's been nearly a week since I tried to say goodbye and hoped the dogs would get their chance even if I didn't get or deserve one. Now we take it one day at a time. The dogs, as always, are doing much better than I am. I miss having someone to talk about them to all of the time: About the chance to blog as the Missaroo. About Mister peeing on everything. The latest thing the two of them got into the night before. Our day to day lives really. We also miss the added attention.

I'm also really mad at myself most days. It's been hard to turn my frown upside down. Being mad at yourself is sometimes the hardest kind of mad to get over because you have to wake up next to you everyday. You have to look yourself in the mirror everyday. You have to be you everyday. How could I mess up so badly there is no way for me to fix it? And how do I live with that? I don't know. I do know I am blessed to always have the love of Mister and Missy. Although I messed up for them too, they always forgive and forget. Hopefully I can do the same. But it is an uphill climb every day. It's a journey I begin in the morning, wrestle with all day, and doesn't end when I close my eyes at night. I dream about it too. I pray for forgiveness each step of the way. I'm trying to move on one moment at a time.

Monday, March 5, 2012

Special Invitation

I promised a happier blog post in the coming days and well, the wait is over! The Spokane Humane Society has asked the Missaroo to be a guest blogger on their Gizmo blog! How exciting is that!?! We are so stoked and honored. There is one slight problem. I have never actually blogged as the Missaroo before. I've tried to capture her voice a few times on her Facebook page, but only in one or two sentences. Never in a full fledged blog. But I am up for the challenge. I can tell you one thing, it's been really fun trying to think of what to write about. At first I wanted her to tell her adoption story but apparently a cat already beat us to it. So it was back to the drawing board. Thanks to Grams I've come up with two other topics. I've sent one to the humane society to see what they think. Of course, we will keep you updated right here on our blog, plus we'll give you the link when it becomes available. Thanks everyone for your continued support in helping the Missaroo become a star! Loves.

Sunday, March 4, 2012

One More Sad One

So it looks like the dogs didn't get to say goodbye after all. Their dad is probably half way across the country by now. On Saturday morning we got up early, walked early, and waited. I had hoped he'd make contact saying he wanted to see them. I was all ready to take off and leave the extra key under the mat. But my phone never went off and no cars pulled up in my driveway. It looks like he's gone for good. Done with our crap. And I'm too hurt to even function. I get up to walk the dogs, feed the dogs, blog about the dogs, and pee. I spent the rest of the day on the couch. I'm thinking about 14-18 hours. It's hard to keep track after a while. All I know for sure is I'm headed back to it.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

On Another Personal Note

Wow! I logged onto the dog blog this morning and checked out the stats like I do pretty regularly. Normally the top post has maybe four page views. Nothing to write home about, but I'm always happy to see someone is reading it. Today, however, the top post had 19 page views! 19! I think that's pretty close to the all time dog blog record and in record time no doubt. I'm not really sure what to think about all the attention, especially because I cried as I typed it. Doggie-sized Divorce was not easy to write the first time. It was a whole lot harder to proof read. But there you have it. 19 posts. And all by March 2nd to boot. The second of each month has significant meaning for me personally in regards to all of this.

I want to thank you all for reading and apologize for the less up-beat posts. I'll try to catch the dogs doing something hilarious soon. Loves and hugs.